last night...

Last night.
I’m not sure there are words to describe the myriad of emotions I experienced.
I took Gan to Z-pizza and kind of caught the rage – there used to be a Z-pizza on Imperial super close to my house and last time Gan wanted pizza (she is gluten intolerant so Z-pizza is really the only pizza option) we tried to go there only to find it doesn’t exist anymore. I was bitter. Still a little bitter. Still get the rage.
Gan and I watched the GAGA episode of Glee. I caught the joy. The kids and their costumes looked RIDICULOUSLY awesome and hysterical all at the same time. And the balladic version of poker face by Rachel and Shelby was to be admired. Shelby has a very strange voice but there is something almost infectious about it. It brings me joy.
Gan and I watched the season FINALE of Parenthood. I was disappointed. It is already over. The season was too short. The show is too good. Who wants to watch I lost it with Jillian instead of Parenthood. It was a television travesty.
Shalina and I had a conversation that ended with a harsh reality: she is moving out. this weekend. on Sunday. I was crushed. I knew that Shalina was moving out relatively soon (she is getting married in just over 6 weeks) but I thought I had a little more time. I have no time. Time is gone. I am going to miss her more than I can even express. It has been SO INCREDIBLY FUN sharing a wall with her – she is definitely on the list of favorite roommates of all time!
Gan and I slept under the same roof for the last time before her big move to Pismo. I don’t think there is even a word. We have had a GREAT run. Over 2 years of pure crazy. More fun than I could have asked for. An amazing friendship that I cherish. I will miss my everyday friend. I will miss her when I want to go to the movies, or eat at the Olive Pit, or go on a bike ride. I will miss her when I paint my fingernails, watch Ina or TrueLife. I will miss her when I go to put on my Lancers sweatshirt and favorite pj pants only to realize they aren’t there because she stole them back in the college days and will NEVER give them back. I will miss her when I look at our photostrip and I will laugh and smile over the many moments of childhood fun we’ve had! My heart is sad and glad and overwhelmed with gratitude and thankfulness. Megan has been one of the very best aspects of adult life – I hope that God provides avenues for our friendship to continue that I can’t even comprehend at the moment – that it won’t actually be July 16 before I see her again. But it might be. And THAT makes me sad. Yes, I am sad.
sad and crushed and disappointed and joyful with just a tinge of rage.
last night.