the golden list...

The #countdownto30 is coming to a close as TOMORROW is the big day. Tonight at midnight the date will change from March 11 to March 12 and I will go from a glowing girl in her 20's to 30 flirty and fabulous. I'm feeling ok about it honestly. When the clock strikes midnight, it's almost like I get to walk into a decade of new hope. I've grieved and said goodbye to many of the dreams I thought my 20's would hold - to things I thought would happen but just did not. And now I'm here, ready to embrace all that is coming and continue living with a grateful heart, praising the Lord for all He has done and eagerly anticipating all He will do. SO here is my "golden list" - 30 things I am thankful for as I close out 29 and embrace 30...there are many MANY more, but this is a darn good start!

1. My bed - what a gift to lay in the midst of the gloriously comfy and cozy covers that envelop me each night and leave me feeling like I’m laying atop puffy clouds of freshly spun cotton candy each morning

2. A closet that is full, almost overflowing with an abundance of outfit choices - sufficient for all kinds of weather situations - and containing more colors, patterns, and pops of fun than I could ever need

3. Texting - it is SO fun and still just a little crazy to me that even this morning by 8am I had already talked to Anna and Carrie and Shalina about silly and insignificant things but THAT is how friendship works, we share life, in the ordinary EXTRAORDINARY details of the everyday life

4. Big Hair and Bold Lips

5. Accessories that were gifts from friends adding sweet touches of sentimentality to my everyday attire - JUST TODAY I am sporting a button ring from Emily, the antique ring I bought in downtown Orange for my 25th birthday with birthday money from Grandma, the “S” bracelet from Yen, the “shell” bracelet from Abigail, the COFFEE5 bracelet, the necklace I made at the San Clemente beachhouse “crafternoon” with Gan and Kenz, my “S” necklace from Mere, and the new bow earrings I just got for my birthday from Kenz (and I’m also wearing 4 other bracelets too - and yes, I can ROCK a plethora of accessories - I definitely came by my title #accessoryqueen rightly)

6. Goldie - the grandma gold corolla I am tremendously thankful to OWN that runs well and gets me where I need to go each and every day without hesitation - she isn’t super sporty or even much to look at but she is reliable and she is mine and i couldn’t live life without her

7. A job that undoubtedly has hard days and very real challenges but has taught me a lot and allows me to earn a reasonable salary opening the door for me to be invested in ministry and other opportunities that bring my heart to life outside the office

8. Starbucks - aka. COFFEE COFFEE COFFEE aka. YUM! (and maybe some hazelnut creamer)

9. Headaches - I hate them but truly they have molded and shaped my character giving me strength and endurance, teaching me to see suffering and draw close to people in pain, showing me how to lean in and love even through challenging and hard and seemingly unending situation, developing faith, and proving time and time again that the Lord is faithful and so very close

10. Cutie Flats - colored, patterned, bold, bright, with bows, with zippers, with a darling scalloped edge this girl LOVES some teacher shoes

11. Carlsbad State Beach - the vastness of the ocean never fails to make me stop and ponder how big God is and also how small I am. In light of His creation and His power, I feel so capable of just sitting in His mighty hands knowing He is in control and I can simply rest. It is not chaotic. The sun rises, the sun sets, the tide comes in and the waves wash out - there is order and there is majestic beauty - there is purposes and plan. He has got me.

12. The First Evangelical Free Church of Fullerton - my church home - the place where I can walk up and down the plaza on a Sunday morning and be known and loved and embraced.

13. Gateway Church - the church I grew up in and a place I can always come back to - where I can walk in and instantly see my family and where I often find myself moved to tears as I take in the rich heritage and legacy of those who have walked before me and paved the path for my future

14. Chickfila - the food that always sounds good - literally - always - and the best arnold palmer on the planet

15. InDesign - the best design software on the planet (at least in my personal opinion - you can beg to differ and love PhotoShop or Illustrator, but give me my macbook and InDesign FOREVER!) and the method by which I have created many an invitation to celebrate some of the biggest and best moments in the lives of those I love

16. Laughter - the way it releases the soul and instantaneously makes life lighter and easier to breathe through

17. Friends - seriously I don’t have words, I would be lost and utterly incapable of survival without my friends - they bring calm to my crazy and re-establish my footing when i can’t seem to find my way or remember who on earth I am or what I am trying to do - they are the greatest treasure I have in this life and I am forever grateful and deeply touched by each and every one of them

18. Kate Spade anything

19. Cardigans (see the #30daysofcardi posts if you need more, but honestly, enough said)

20. Family - we are spread from Hawaii to Oregon to sunny San Diego but in my heart they’re all right there - I miss them so much it hurts but i am forever grateful they’re mine

21. World Changers - it taught me to be a servant and to tangibly be the hands of Jesus Christ to those around me - it was foundational in my relationship with Jesus Christ and undoubtedly four (4) of the best summers of my life - it has RUINED me for husbands because never have I met more godly men - and the song is unlike any other - GO OUT AND CHANGE THE WORLD!

22. LifeGroup - the people I learned to live loud and bold alongside, to share my heart in safety knowing it would be held and carried - to tell the WHOLE story without hiding and find freedom in the vulnerable - I miss Wednesday nights in Matt & Shan’s little living room with kids fussing Carrie begging to hold the newest Stull - and sometimes I think I might even miss talking Crossfit and paleo - you were worth it!

23. Nailpolish and Lipstick

24. CHOSEN and TLC - I had no ideas the ways in which these ministries would capture my heart and change my life. I love these kids. I love that I get to love these kids. Hearing their laughter and watching them interact reminds me time and time again that I am exactly where I am supposed to be and the Lord is at work in ways that are far beyond my imagination!

25. Target - if you need some happiness go to Target they have it. GUARANTEED.

26. The Internet - how could a blogger (or a human for that matter) NOT be grateful for the Internet?? I love reading blogs, I love streaming music, I love podcasts, I love FaceBook and Instagram, but the best gift the internet ever game was my dear friend Carrielove

27. Snail Mail and Gifts or Packages - there is something really special about taking pen to paper to make words have meaning beyond the instantaneous (and yes, I do still believe in thank you notes!) or putting together a little collection of items that will make someone smile on the inside - I adore being able to send smiles

28. Diane - she is a mentor and a friend and calls herself my “fullerton mommy” she cries with me on hard days and reminds me that even when it hurts I am still choosing the Lord and doing ok - she has given me permission to be a mess on more occasions than I care to admit and that has allowed me to embrace some of the broken and aching pieces of me and move into hope and joy in new ways

29. rooted - 29 would have been almost a total bust without rooted - it gave me my Mands - undoubtedly one of the most incredible women I have ever known and a friend who I have the honor and privilege of walking closely alongside in this season of joy and sorrow of celebration and longing AND it also gave me my Biola Loves and THE Meggerator creating THECOFFEE5 women who have taught me how to laugh harder and open the floodgates just a little wider to let the love spill forth - we are walking together - growing together - talking hearts and Christ and leaning in - yes rooted was what God had for 29 and I am SUPER grateful

30.  Adoption /  Foster Kids - my heart to love God’s kids is something I am so excited about especially as I move into my 30’s and contemplate the possibility of actually getting to bring a little one home. The day deplane and see family and friends waiting at the airport to meet our newest lovebug will be a surge of joy so indescribable - I absolutely cannot wait!