Izzy's Aunt Shell...

On Saturday I “played mom” and spent all day watching Izzy and Rory while Carrie and Joe were at work. Izzy has grown up so much - she is full of words and knows all her shapes and colors - she has the sweetest little voice and I truly believe there is nothing better than hearing her excitedly greet me as “Aunt Shell”. I adore getting to love on those kiddies. I love that they’re basically my niece and nephew even though Carrie isn’t actually my sister.

I remember the day Izzy was born like it was yesterday. I got the call super early in the morning that Carrie had been admitted and Izzy was on her way. I got up and headed to get Starbucks for the daddy-to-be and then headed to the hospital. Carrie and I were roommates when she got pregnant, so the journey to Izzy’s birth had been a deep and meaningful season for our friendship. I watched the world spiral around her as she became a wife and a mother in a matter of months. I remember holding her hand in that hospital room just bursting with pride over the woman my dear friend had become and the ways the Lord had worked in her heart. I wasn’t there when Izzy was born - I was new to my job and felt like I needed to go to work, but I remember returning to the hospital that evening to meet her. When I walked into the room, she was in the arms of her Uncle Fred. I wanted so badly to steal a peek at her, but I also knew I wanted a moment - just us - to fully take her in. I waited with eager anticipation, and she claimed my heart the moment that tiny little hand grabbed my finger. I remember crying, and praying, and singing a little lullaby. Within seconds, I became Izzy’s Aunt Shell.

When Izzy was only 2 months old, she got very sick. She was diagnosed with Biliary Atresia and the situation was incredibly serious. She spent the next several months in and out of the hospital, and ultimately it became clear that Iz would need a liver transplant (and soon) to survive. I spent a great deal of timing visiting Iz at UCLA - she was growing increasingly yellow and every time I saw her it seemed she had another tube. We knew her condition was grave and there was a very real possibility we would be saying goodbye. One particular Thursday I remember being overwhelmed by this feeling that I had to go see her. I had to say goodbye. I believe the Lord in His graciousness was preparing me for what could come. I spent several hours crying and praying by her little hospital crib. I held that same squishy little hand but was vastly aware that the Izzy I knew was only kind of there. Between the sedation to keep her comfortable and the poison taking over her body, she really wasn’t the same. On Saturday I went to a party at Matt and Shannon’s. I sat on the couch with Shan and sobbed - I remember asking her how to be a friend, how to love well, how to be supportive and strong when my best friend’s daughter dies. I remember looking at Shannon and saying “She is going to die Shan. She is going to die.” Shannon responded, “I know.” We held each other and I truly didn’t know how we would ever move on.

Only hours later, the phone rang - it was Carrie - Izzy got a liver. I went to pick up Matt and Shannon and we headed to the hospital to be with Carrie and Joe while Izzy was in surgery. We sat in that waiting room all night praying over Izzy Mae - hoping the Lord would give us a miracle - begging Him to let us keep her. In His glorious and infinite mercy, He gave Izzy another chance at life. The transplant was successful and when we saw her only hours after the surgery was complete, she already looked so much better. It was the beginning of a long road towards healing, with lots of labs and medications and several more weeks in the hospital. However, it was hope like I had never experienced it before…our Izzy was alive.

As I played with Izzy on Saturday I just couldn’t help but reflect on how grateful I am to have her around. She fills me with joy and makes me smile deep in my soul. She is a gift and such evidence that the Lord is at work in our lives. He is near and present and involved. I am forever grateful for my Izzy girl and I pray I never forget what the Lord gave us in her. I really am forever blessed to be her Aunt Shell.

Another day I’ll write a post about Rory - he is pretty darn great too!

HIGH FIVE FOR FRIDAY!!!!

WHEW this week has been CRAZY full and I am SO READY for the weekend.
I wish I could say this weekend was going to be calm, full of moments of relaxation and refreshment, but I’m pretty sure I’m gonna continue the crazy for the foreseeable future! I’m a gluten for punishment…or at least exhaustion!

So here are my top 5 moments of the week…
1. When I got home from my perfect little weekend escape to San Francisco on Sunday evening, there was a package waiting for me - it contained a whole lot of lippy love from my sweet friend Ally - it kicked the week off on the right foot. LOVED IT and LOVE ALLY for being such a dear friend AND sending me a package!!

2. Monday I had lunch with one of my absolute faves - my closie Rachel (aka. R - we like to pretend we’re Gossip Girl - I mean who doesn’t love Blair aka. B and Serena aka. S?!?!?!!) and after catching up over some delicious eats we started really dreaming and planning for CHOSEN. Just thinking about all that is to come through CHOSEN makes my heart beat faster. I am so humbled and honored to be leading the charge for these kids and I can’t wait to see what the Lord will do.

3. Tuesday was the day I realized my sweet friend Carrie would be in California visiting in less than a week and I better get my act together because she is gluten intolerant and doesn’t drink coffee or alcohol and…well…let’s just say my current food supply will not be sufficient for her needs! I left her a voicemail saying something along those lines and she said it went down as one of her all-time favorite voicemails! It even made her FB status! ha! I was so tickled!

4. Wednesday night I got to see my ROOTED family! We had a major planning session because promoting ROOTED kicks into HIGH GEAR on Sunday morning and we’re all part of the RMT (Rooted Ministry Team). It was so fun to see them again - it’s crazy how close you can get to people in a really short period of time when you let down your guard and lean into the Lord together.

5. Last night was one of my favorite nights of the summer…I’m a total Broadway nerd. I’m addicted and obsessed and I hope someday I marry a man who also loves Broadway or at least loves ME enough to tolerate Broadway and wants to take me to shows and buy me season tickets! EEEK! Anyway, each summer the city of Tustin sponsors “Broadway in the Park” and it is PERFECTION. You come with your picnic blanket and beach chairs, a spread of fun foods and perhaps a beverage or two and enjoy a full-scale Broadway performance while the sun sets in the background and the stars come out to play. This year Jordan and I joined Ally and her parents for a some chipotle and blended margaritas and then s’mores bars for dessert while watching Peter Pan! SO FUN!

In addition to ALL that, this week I also watched Bachelor in Paradise with Jordan and the roomies, had dinner with my friends Rhonda and Kimi, lunch with Shalina and her nugget, my annual review in celebration of my 3rd year at AkinsParker Creative AND got an oil change. WHEW! What a week!

CHOSEN...coming fall 2014

I have talked about Foster Kids quite a bit on my blog.
I talk about Foster Kids a lot in my regular life.
The BOLD Truth is : I LOVE FOSTER KIDS!
(whew, it feels good to have that out there in the open!)

For several years I have been involved with Teen Leadership Camp (sponsored by EvFree). TLC is an amazing summer escape for Foster Kids ages 12 - 17. This year I was on the leadership team and played an integral part in planning every detail from ridiculous games to evening activities and AMAZINGLY DELICIOUS snack packs. This summer TLC was fantastic. It was the best camp we’ve ever done (at least if you ask me or Alise!) I was the Queen of Fun and I loved it. However, three (3) days with the kids goes by SO FAST and it is painful to have to wait until the next summer to see them again. We say goodbye on Sunday afternoon and by Monday morning I miss hearing them laugh and wish so badly we could just go back to camp, at least for a few more days!

So…this year we’re going to try something new! Alongside my treasured and super passionate friend Rachel Williams, I am Co-Directing a new ministry at EvFree - CHOSEN - a monthly club (that will loosely resemble a youth group) for teenage kids that have been touched by the Foster Care System. On the 3rd Saturday of every month, we will gather to encourage, support, laugh, eat, and build relationships of trust that hopefully allow these kids to see the love of Christ on a consistent basis. We will get to be part of our campers lives. We will get to see them nine (9) times before we go to camp in June! I am beyond excited. I am ecstatic! I have absolutely no idea where God is going to take this ministry. I am hoping that it is a gift to these kids and that it gives them new hope and the start of a foundation for a future that looks different than the one they may have been born into. These kids are beyond incredible and if I we can be part of their success stories, then glory be to God.

SO...will you come alongside me? Will you pray for me and Rachel and the team of invested leaders who are going to pour into these kids? Will you pray the caregivers will be willing to bring the kids? Will you pray the kids have open hearts and so much fun at CHOSEN that they want to come back each month? Will you pray God provides the speakers, worship leaders, and financial resources for EvFree to support this new ministry? Will you pray opportunities will rise up for us to mentor the kids one-on-one and develop deep and meaningful relationships? Will you pray that God works mightily in ways we can not even begin to ask for?

God can do GREAT things and I trust that He will, I’d love to share the journey with you.
I am sure it is gonna be a whirlwind…and this is just the introductory blog post...HERE WE GO!

the great escape...

Last weekend I escaped reality - I hopped on a plane and literally ran away - and it was perfection. I landed in San Francisco on Friday night just before 10:00pm and was greeted warmly by my dear sweet friend Joy! She gave me the biggest hug and off we went to spend a treasured weekend together.

I woke up Saturday morning around 9:30am to the smell of breakfast baking and fresh coffee (with Samoa Girl Scout Cookie creamer - OMG) just waiting for me. Joy SPOILED ME ROTTEN with a delicious homemade meal to kick-start our day and topped it off with mimosas (I am a super fan of the bubbly!). Then we went shopping - we hit Nordstrom Rack to pickup a Kate Spade vacation treasure and Target for matching lace tops (inspired by Kendi Everday) and an afternoon Starbucks beverage. Then we headed into ULTA to pick out the perfect new lipstick for our evening on the town. Joy definitely knows me and speaks straight to my heart.

Saturday night we got gussied up and headed out - Joy got us tickets to see Dreamgirls and it did not disappoint. I am OBSESSED with all things Broadway - shows are my absolute favorite! When the show was over, we headed home to watch Pitch Perfect and eat ice-cream. It was the perfect day.

Sunday morning we went to brunch at Joy’s very favorite place - it was DELICIOUS. We had coffee and cocktails alongside “The Day After Burger” - it was the most delicious plate of disgusting food I’ve seen in a long time and my mouth watered IMMEDIATELY! It was an open-faced burger served on a bed of fried mashed potatoes with a sausage patty coated in pepper jack cheese and gravy topped with bacon. I die. With our stomachs stuffed to the max, we headed into the city. It was ridiculously fun driving on the San Francisco Bridge - it felt so very iconic. Because there is an INSANE amount of  traffic in the city, we grabbed a hand-made ice-cream cone at Bi-Rite (I went for toffee coffee and Joy picked créme brûlée) and called it a day.

I was back at the airport far too soon, but the weekend was a perfect blend of laziness and adventure. I got to catch up with my Joy and hear all about her heart and life and that was a true gift. We are both in this crazy season of life where we are celebrating other people but don’t have much to celebrate personally - so we found a way to cheer each other on - and I sincerely hope we do it again soon! Love me some Joy Gadd and a weekend in the windy city!

stuff...

I am ashamed to say this, but I’m a stuff person - I really, REALLY like my stuff.

I have had roommates for years now and I am a firm believer that roommates build character. I have had some really challenging roommates through the years, and I have also been blessed with roommates who have become amazing and dear friends (love you Rachey, love you Shalina, love you Carrie, love you Kenz); but regardless roommates use / wear on / destroy your stuff. Period. Unavoidable. I’ve gotten much better about letting go and not obsessing about my belongings as God has definitely asked me to grow in this area of life; however, I still hear things break and cringe on the inside. I love my Pottery Barn dishes and my Anthro latte bowls, my collection of cake plates and the two sets of dessert plates that I pull out for special occasions. I love the set of Williams Sonoma mixing bowls that were a gift from Jim and Sandy Clark for a birthday one year and all the glassware I collected for my 25th birthday martini party! I’m a sentimental person so I become overly attached - that bowl I bought with Christmas money from grandma or that water flute I purchased to throw my first Christmas party when I lived on my own for the first time - almost everything has a story - and yes, I know I’m ridiculous.

My friend Megan is headed to Texas this week to begin work on her graduate degree. We got together for dinner late last week to catch up and say goodbye and were discussing her apartment needs over delicious margaritas when it occurred to me that I had a set of Martha Stewart pans hidden in the back of one of my kitchen cupboards. I purchased the pans years ago (probably 2008) when they were on clearance at Macy’s. I got a great price on them and they were so cute - red and aqua in alternating colors when stacked. I adored them…so much so that I hid them and never let anyone use them because I just knew my roommates would destroy them. I think somewhere deep down I thought I would just save them for when I got married and I definitely imagined that happening before now. As I sat there, I was convicted. I don’t need those pans. I have a set that we use as needed and they work just fine. All of the sudden I just blurted out, I have a set of pans you can have if you need them Megs. I’m not sure I can pinpoint the emotion that won out as I handed over those beautiful pans (with stickers still on them - though they were covered in dust and probably had a couple dead bugs nestled between them), but I do know it is what the Lord would have had me do.

I want to love people more than my stuff. I want to be generous more than I want to hoard. I want to be faithful and obedient more than I want to be consumed by the world. And I sincerely hope and pray that handing over those pans was proof that my heart is moving in the right direction...and let's be honest, I can always just register for a new (bright and shiny) set when I get married someday!

they're the highlight of my summer

I cannot believe it is August and the summer is coming to a close…not that summer is really a thing in adult life. I go to work 5 days / week in the summer just like any other season of the year. In fact, winter is quickly becoming my favorite season - the holiday season means LOTS of days out of the office and that is something I have come to truly adore! However, I do love the warm weather (especially because we have central air! praise the Lord!) and the adventures that seem to correspond with the months of June - August!

This blog would NOT be an accurate reflection of my life if I didn’t take a moment to post about the little ladies that were the highlight of my summer. My big brother Kevin, his wife Jamie, and their two girls - my favorite tiny human - Madeline and Charlotte were in California for almost the entire month of July. Kev took 21 days of leave and returned home after a year and a half TRAPPED in paradise. It was SO good to spend some time together and make a few memories. I’ve been to Hawaii twice since they moved in January of 2013, so I haven’t been totally deprived, but I definitely miss driving down to San Diego for the weekend to sneak in a couple squeezes, I didn’t realize what a true luxury that was until they were gone.

Our first meet-up was pretty stinking special - for the first time in years and years and years I got to see my brother on his actual birthday - July 16. The whole crew (including my parents and my little sister Julie) headed to Knotts Berry Farm for the day, and since I had to work but live relatively close, I was able to meet up with them for dinner at Mrs. Knotts Chicken Diner. We ate our fair share of fried chicken and then I took Madeline back to the hotel for some pool time while Kevin, Jamie and Charlotte hit the park up for a couple extra hours. I stayed way too late but there is absolutely nothing better than cuddling with my M-girl!

That Saturday Jamie’s brother got married in Huntington Beach, so after Madeline’s flower-girl duties were complete, I picked up two super sleep but absolutely gorgeous girlies from the reception and took them home to my house for a slumber party - they really did mostly slumber - but they looked DARN CUTE in the matching pink polka dot pajamas I had waiting for them at my house. Sunday we went to church together where Charlotte was absolutely mesmerized by the fountain and then all had lunch at Arthurs! SO FUN!

The following weekend I headed back to San Diego to be around as much as possible their last weekend in town. Saturday morning sweet Charlotte just played and played and played. She loves Mr. Potato Head and apparently really wants glasses! Sunday we were ALL in church together - I looked down that row and my eyes filled with tears - my entire family - together - a rare and treasured moment. That afternoon we all had lunch at my parent’s house, which was lovely and all too soon it was time to say goodbye!

I always cherish the time with my littles, their a tremendous gift and the absolute joy of my heart. I praise the Lord often for making me an aunt - it is a blessing beyond compare! That said, there are still a couple summer adventures yet to come for me! I’m headed to San Francisco next weekend to escape real life and catch up with my dear friend Joy and then the last week of August the amazing Carrie is headed to California and I cannot wait to hug that girl in baggage claim! Good things are still to come…

ROOTED

This summer I had the privilege of being in ROOTED - a beta group for a Bible Study that will kick off in a HUGE way at my church - Ev. Free Fullerton - this fall. Under the guidance of Erin Kerr, a group of us studied together, lived life together, prayed over one another, broke bread and truly learned what it meant to BE THE CHURCH. In 10 weeks, we became more than just friends - with a foundation in Christ and a true desire to grow together, our relationships became deep and meaningful almost instantaneously. Last night we had our final gathering and spent two-hours affirming the gifts God has given each of us. It was incredible to listen to my brothers as sisters as they generously lathered one another with words of encouragement, inspiring each of us to live as a vessel of truth. After dinner, affirmations, and communion, Jason humbly asked Erin if he would be willing to perform a baptism. So right then, right there, in the Encarnacion pool, I wept as Jason joined the family and proclaimed boldly that He belonged. It was the perfection culmination of our journey. Long after our time together officially came to a close, we lingered, sharing coffee and tea, conversing late into the night, hesitant to say goodbye knowing we won’t be together next Wednesday. What a tremendous blessing to love each other so much, after such a short time, that the goodbye was heavy. The Lord did tremendous things in our midst and I love that from this point forward I will get to watch as He uses each of us mightily to continue His work.

bury the dreams...

Yesterday I found out my childhood best friend, Anna, is having a girl. I wish I could somehow explain the surge of conflicting emotions that flooded me as I looked at that darling picture of three swimsuits - one for daddy, one for mommy, and one for baby girl Garcia. I was instantaneously SO excited - Anna wanted a girl so bad - she has been calling “it” a “her” since the very beginning. We have prayed for this sweet little girl and we want her so badly! I truly could not be happier for Ann! The joy is deep and being Aunt Shell to her bitty is going to be such a tremendous gift. However, as I glimpsed at that picture, the tears welled up in my eyes and I felt myself burying the dreams yet once again. You see I don’t have a single memory of life without Anna. She was literally my very best friend growing up - she was the only friend I was allowed to spend the night with, she came to every birthday party (and brought chicken pox with her one year), together we did dance classes, AWANA (where we RULED at the two-legged race in the Awana Olympics), children’s choir, youth choir, played dress-up and barbies and school, we went to the same high school, took lots of AP classes, visited numerous countries in Europe with the Red Robe Choir, went to World Changers, took pictures for prom in her backyard, we went on family vacations to Carlsbad State Beach every single summer where we played hours of Canasta and Yahtzee, painted nails and made lanyards, a vast majority of the clothes I wore as a little girl were hand-me-downs from Anna - our memories are literally endless. In 2007 we both graduated with our undergraduate degrees. In May I left for World Changers while Anna was waiting for word on acceptance to med school. While I was gone, Anna and Daniel got engaged and before I got home, they were married and I started to bury the dreams. I can’t tell you how many tears I’ve shed over missing Anna’s bridal shower, bachelorette, and wedding. Those were moments I KNEW we would share. Never for a second did I think I would be the bridesmaid in the program that couldn't attend the actual ceremony. But even more than that, I feel like I missed out on double dating with her, talking about boys and falling in love together, something I just always envisioned. Fast forward 7 years and I’m burying the dreams yet again. This time it looks a little different…this time I’m saying goodbye to raising our kids together. I know I will be Aunt Shell and she will be Aunt Anna, but I wanted desperately to have a little girl the same age as Anna’s little girl. I wanted them to grow up as best friends and make a lifetime of memories. I know that my friendship with Anna is extremely rare - most people don’t get to know someone FOREVER - but I do. Anna is my FOREVER FRIEND. I think deep down I always thought we would pass that gift on. And yes, there is a possibility I could have a kid with her at some point in the future. But let’s be realistic - I am not currently in a relationship so we’re talking at least 3-5 years before I’m having any children. Anna will likely have at least one more in that time period, which will leave me further and further behind. I know it doesn’t diminish our friendship and of course I will be around to love on her kids and I have no doubt she’ll love on mine. I just never realized how deeply those little seeds of hope were rooted and how much it would hurt to let them go.

my love language...kate spade...

I am anything but educated in the world of fashion and high-end products. I’m totally a target / gap / sometimes old navy / nordstrom rack / TJMaxx kinda shopper. However, I do have a slight obsession with and deep love for almost all things Kate Spade. She is my love language. Everything is bold and bright and striped and polka dotted and she believes in glitter, which makes my heart beat just a little bit faster.

My friends know that Kate is a sure-fire way to my heart. Over the years, I have developed a fun little collection thanks to generous and lovely people like Megan McAlpine, Jenny Redmond, Emily Diaz, Rachel Williams and Rebecca Madsen. I love putting on jewels and thinking about the person who gifted them to me…the bracelet Emily gave me for being her maid of honor or the bracelet R left on my bed for our one-month friendiversary, the bracelet Gan gave me for my 29th birthday and the perfect pink earrings Kenz gave me the morning I left for my first trip to Hawaii. Every memory is special and I love that jewelry encapsulates all that.

In addition to gifts, I’ve also invested in the collection myself in celebration of birthdays, graduations, tax returns, and sometimes just a job well done or a week survived! Thankfully Kate has sales from time to time and I often find her stuff at heavily discounted prices in places like Nordstrom Rack and TJMaxx and just cannot help myself. Her stuff is just my favorite.

Do you love Kate Spade? Do you have a different “favorite” designer?
 
(The picture above includes most of my collection, but there are a few pieces I couldn’t find online and lots LOTS more that I’m sure I would LOVE to have!)

matchy mcmatchersons

I have this awesome friend named Ally. She is hilarious and quirky and always looks super cute. She wears BOLD brights and lots of polka dots and has the confidence to rock absolutely anything she puts on. She also manages to find the BEST chunky accessories at Kohls, which BAFFLES ME because I almost never find anything there (other than all the Lauren Conrad stuff, which is right up my alley!). Anyway, Ally and I are in the same Bible Study this summer and TWICE now we have shown up wearing the same EXACT outfit. The first time it happened I was shocked. I saw her walking across the parking lot and thought, “no, surely she is not wearing the same navy blue and hot pink striped dress I am…” and sure enough she was…with gold accessories and similar shoes to top it off. Then, the VERY NEXT WEEK, we both arrived wearing (brand new) pink polka dot tops (thanks Old Navy - so cute!). I literally could not believe it. What are the chances. I am still totally tickled. We did not plan it either time, but obviously we both have AMAZING taste and look darling virtually all the time! We have bible study tonight and I'm wearing stripes...I wonder what my girl Ally has on...