the countdown...

It is 10:44pm on Sunday, December 30, 2012 and there is this huge part of me that doesn’t want to go to sleep because I know when I wake up the goodbye countdown will click down from 2 days to tomorrow.

I feel like I’ve been fighting tears all day – but it was a wonderful day!

This morning we woke up really early to go take pictures as a family. My dear friend Amber is a fantastic photographer and after we got rained out of yesterday afternoon’s scheduled shoot, she graciously offered to get up, toss on a sweatshirt, and meet us in the park barring any negative weather conditions. Praise the Lord it turned out fabulously and I think we’re going to have some incredible pictures together. Madeline smiled beautifully and according to Amber, she looked like a GAP model. Our sweet Charlotte showed off her big eyes with only a few tiny tears and even braved the cold without a blanket for a few pictures. As the sun rose shedding glorious light over the fall leaves, I couldn’t help but gaze at my family and with an extremely thankful heart, and with that joy came a tinge of sorrow knowing it may be a while before we’re all together again.

With picture making complete, we headed to church for Kevin and Jamie’s last Sunday at Gateway. I had to force myself not to look at my sweet sister-in-law as the tears streamed down her face…I knew if I saw her crying there would be no recovery for me. Our dear Pastor’s Wife Nancy Williams came up to check on me and a few tears fell…it just isn’t going to be the same without them…but it meant so much to me that she cared about my heart in this time. Saying goodbye is always a challenge. I went outside to play with Madeline and soak up her laughter – sometimes I wish I could bank the great moments – I am so glad God gave us brains that store memories – they are invaluable.

We left church and headed to lunch at Round Table Pizza. Madeline managed to snag a couple tootsie rolls from the candy crane (thanks to a couple quarters from Aunt Shell) and we enjoyed a surprisingly fabulous meal together. After lunch Jamie and I jetted off to do a quick return and get pedicures (you can’t go to Hawaii with wonky toe nails). With Starbucks beverages in hand, we enjoyed a delightful hour of pampering alongside reminiscent conversation. We are truly sisters and our friendship is one of the greatest joys in my life. I don’t know that I could have said that 10 years ago, but God is mighty and works in incredible ways. He has bonded us on a level far deeper than I could have imagined and she will forever be an example of His power in my life.

We came home and enjoyed a bit more of the afternoon as a family while Madeline napped. We passed Charlotte around and soaked up the snuggles – she’s in the PERFECT cuddle stage right now and is content in anyone’s arms. It is the best. All too soon we had to say goodbye for today. So we hugged a little tighter than usual and said see you tomorrow knowing we will only be able to say that a few more times.

I don’t know if I can adequately express how excited I am for my brother and his family – this is an incredible adventure for them and I have absolutely no doubt that God is going to work mightily in and through them. And hey, if you have to move out of San Diego, Hawaii is probably the next best place! Kevin is going to be an incredible nurse and I honestly think he is going to LOVE his army career. Jamie will be an exceptional officer’s wife and will quickly be involved in a multitude of activities and enriching the lives of those in her community. They’ll find a new church family and they’ll make a little home for themselves, this is going to be GREAT for them. But selfishly, I’m going to miss them being around. I’m going to miss driving down to San Diego eagerly anticipating hugs from Madeline and evenings together laughing and watching all kinds of interesting television (you should see Kevin’s DVR – it’s like nothing you’ve ever seen before). These years together have been a gift beyond measure and I do not take them for granted. Now I guess I’m just going to have to get really good at fitting a lot of stuff into flat rate shipping boxes and searching for cheap flights…